Hat tip to Brett. And I have to agree with the comments: this can’t be a Georgia fan. But Hairy Dawg responds just like a Georgia fan.
Sweet ESPN Georgia Commercial
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Category Archives: UGA Football
Better Off by Winning More Games
On the upcoming bowl game for the Georgia Bulldogs in Shreveport (where the ‘Dawgs will spend Christmas day):
Tackle Clint Boling also was disappointed but pointed out the Bulldogs could have been better off by winning more games.
And to Hell with Georgia Tech
Ahh, what a weekend. Both football teams representing the division champions in the Atlantic Coast Conference (or American Cupcake Conference, if you will) were beaten by unranked Southeastern Conference teams. Clemson was knocked off by South Carolina, and Georgia Tech got stomped by the University of Georgia Bulldogs. What an accomplishment, winning the ACC. Westerdawg even asked if the ACC Championship was a real thing (no way).
The best part? All the Georgia Tech fans talking trash for the past 365 days. You’d think they might watch out, since they’ve beaten Georgia once (ONCE!) in the past nine years. But no, they shot their mouthes off for a whole year. And now they can eat crow.
Some highlights:
- HeyJennySlater chronicles the trash talk (there was so much, especially on the AJC blog comments)
- The Senator is still savoring.
- Georgia Tech Coach Paul Johnson basically says Georgia hasn’t done anything since 1980. DawgSports doesn’t like that and lists 8 or more reasons Tech defines itself by UGA.
- Remember what Tech players did to the Hedges last year? Georgia center Ben Jones evened the score (btw, I think destroying an opponents field is bad from either or any side).
And as the words go:
Glory, glory to old Georgia. And to Hell with Georgia Tech!
Go Dawgs!
Stafford Takes a Beating and Wins
Lion’s first-year quarterback Matt Stafford rocks. He takes a beating, separates his shoulder, eludes the team doctors, and comes back in to win the game. Don’t forget, he was a standout at UGA! Matt Stafford rocks.
Nerd Hate Week 2009: The Dating Doctor
So I have been waiting to publish this post, and even more so after I spotted the inhumane cartoon posted by the Georgia Tech Sports Blog National blog (titled Ding Dong the Mutt is Dead!). Payback’s a bitch.
Over the years I have made a conscious effort to make fun of the Georgia Institute of Technology (Georgia Tech). One of these posts (Georgia Tech Student Needs Kissing Lessons, a true story) made a big splash and one of my most visited posts to date. I hope this post is just as good.
It seems that recently, the Georgia Tech Student Center Programs Council has seen a deficiency in Georgia Tech students. Apparently that deficiency is dating.
So they did what any self respecting university would do, they hired David Coleman, the self-proclaimed “Dating Doctor”. I kid you not. David Coleman’s byline is “America’s Real-Life Hitch,” a reference to the movie Hitch. Hitch is a dating doctor played by Will Smith who coaches hopeless men to date the women of their dreams. If only those Techies could learn these lessons, they could take over the world.
Sadly, attending World of Warcraft parties and majoring in chemical engineering don’t help your case.
Again, I’m not making this up. Here’s the event listing on Georgia Tech’s calendar and here it is listed on the Fall 2009 programs (pdf) for November 12. There is a photo gallery on Flickr (only the nerds would hire a guy that looks like this to teach them how to date). There is a post on Twitter, from this Georgia Tech female (rare) student (she’s apparently a model, I wonder why she needed to go to this). She remarked, “The dating doctor talked in the student center tonight and was actually really helpful.” I want to know what she learned.
And have you seen the website Only at Tech? A site in the style of FMyLife.com, people tell their little stories about life at the North Avenue Trade School. Three note the visit by the “Dating Doctor”:
- I get an email today informing me of the new ‘Dating Doctor’, GT’s real-life Hitch, on campus. Only at Tech.
- So the other day my friend was talking about that dating doctor guy that came to the student center. I asked him if he went, and he replied” Yeah, and I even took notes!” Only at Tech
- The Dating Doctor is coming to speak at the Student Center! Only at Tech.
I love making fun of Georgia Techies (see these pictures here, here, and here).
But this guy, this “Real-Life Hitch” sounds like a winner too. Let’s take a look at some of the advice on his site. Here are a few of his recommended pickup lines:
- “I’ll keep buying you drinks. You tell me when I get good looking.” [you can't make this stuff up, people]
- “If your beauty was measured in light, I’d see you coming from a mile away.” [I'm sure a Techie could find some problem in that math statement]
- “Would you like to meet Russell? Russell my love muscle.” [Wow]
- “You must have glue on your butt, because my eyes have been stuck there all night.”
The Love Doctor also lists some “kiss off quotes” which I’m sure my friends on North Avenue hear frequently:
- “I’m not attracted to you in that way”
- “It’s me. It really is. It’s not you”
- “I really just want to be friends”
- “You’re like a brother (or sister) to me”
This Love Doctor even has a list of items to take on a first date:
-Tums or Rolaids (in case your meal doesn’t sit well or nerves hit)
-Breath mints and gum (bad breath can shorten a date in a hurry)
-A small mirror to check your appearance and teeth for food particles
-An extra set of car keys (for pretty obvious reasons!)
-Chapstick….keep those lips soft and voluptuous
-A small list of 5 things to do on the date or talk about in case of awkward pauses, silence or indecision
-A small piece of paper with your date’s name, address and phone number on it just in case you forget this vital information!
-Phone numbers to contact friends or family in case the date isn’t going well
-A tiny (travel size) deodorant, cologne, hairbrush and toothbrush (in case a nervous nature changes your body chemistry)
-Extra money (in a pocket), including phone change, in case you lose your wallet or cell phone
-A condom (which, by the way, if you use, will signal your last date!).
-A couple of aspirin or Advil (in case your date causes more stress than he or she relieves)
-A smile, eye contact, a firm handshake and self-confidence that doesn’t appear arrogant.
-A positive attitude! If you don’t think you are going to have fun, you probably won’t!
Georgia Tech students, if you can fit all of that AND your light saber in the pockets of your cargo pants, you are ready to go on your first date, courtesy of “America’s Hitch.”
Ramblin’ wreck from Georgia Tech and needing a dating doctor.
On UGA Football
Macon Telegraph‘s David Hale has a good overview of the worst losses for University of Georgia football since Mark Richt became head coach, and where Saturday’s loss ranks. Then he goes into the problems of the past two years in depth. This is a very good read for any Dawg fan.
Georgia Tech Cartoon of Dead Uga
This is why I hate Georgia Tech (after Uga VII died this week).
Remembering Uga VII
Uga VII, Damn Good Dawg.
Georgia-Florida Week 2009
It’s that time of year end, when thousands of Bulldog faithful make the annual weekend migration to Jacksonville, Florida, for the University of Georgia vs. University of Florida football game. The game which is better known as the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party (I don’t care what Iron Mike says).
This year, the game seems to be not too big of a deal. The Gators are ranked #1 in the land, and the Dawgs come into the game with 3 big losses.
I’ve got no reservations about this game. I know we are the underdawgs by 15 points. And we’ll likely be playing against more than 11 men (“I’m sure we’ll get one of those letters that mean nothing, that Bobby [Petrino] got last week, but Florida and Alabama live on,” Kiffin said). But that doesn’t mean that a lot isn’t on the line.
I, for one, don’t want to see Tim Tebow break Herschel Walker’s record for career rushing touchdowns in the Southeastern Conference. Granted, Walker’s was in a different time, when stats were calculated differently (look at the stats, Herschel was better) and even the Junkyard Blawg notes that the comparisons are bogus.
But I want to see UGA win! I’ve been there, felt the pain and heartbreak of another loss AND the joy and elation of a win. That elation is awesome.
We’ve got the team to do it (look at the stars, including AJ Green). But Florida’s going to be coming after us. They are still (???) looking to avenge the excessive celebration of 2007.
Don’t believe me? Read this:
Georgia wants to avenge an embarrassing 49-10 loss. And Florida is still fired up about Georgia’s 2007 end-zone celebration. DT Terron Sanders calls it a “sign of disrespect,” among other things, after Georgia “stormed the field.”
“We feel as if it’s a slap in the face,” Sanders said. “We can’t just let it be a one-year thing where we feel like we took care of it. We always have to look back at it as disrespect.”
I find that funny as hell. Why? Because right after that, this R-E-S-P-E-C-T shouting Sanders says this in the same interview:
Surely Georgia might show footage of the closing minutes of last year’s game, when Coach Urban Meyer called three timeouts, just for kicks.
“I thought it was funny,” Sanders said. “At the same time, I dind’t know if he did it just to try to get more reps in or what…We’re going to go ahead and continue to say we did it to get more game-time experience for the younger players.”
You want to talk about respect? You were up by 39 points. You want respect, you give respect. I have stronger words for this guy, but I’m going to let them slide.
So Florida, we’re coming for you.
SEC Admits Another Mistake
The Southeastern Conference has admitted to committing another (UGA-LSU excessive celebration call) officiating mistake that likely decided a big conference game. How long will this go on? What do fans have to do to see close games decided by players, and not referees? At least Penn Wagers has stayed out of the limelight.
Update (10/20/2009): Tony Barnhart and Georgia Sports Blog agree that there need to be changes.
Update (10/22/2009): The Southeastern Conference has suspended the crew involved in both the Arkansas-Florida and Georgia-LSU games. Finally. Here’s coverage at the AJC and the Georgia Sports Blog. ESPN has an interview with the head referee of the crew, who offers a mea culpa (and doesn’t get my forgiveness).